Here We Go Again

Am I a target for emotional men? Or do I drive the men to become emotional? I once again found myself in a heated and intoxicated conversation, out at a bar on a Friday night, with a guy who does not understand why I don’t make more time for him. Why I care so much about my career. Why I am not emotionally affected by how our “relationship” is going. He even went so far as to recount instances where I was careless with him and how I blew him off.

Sort of what we looked like but picture better hair (via)

Excuse me? 

I just want to go out and have a good time. Is this really necessary? 

The conversation left me reeling the next day. This was completely unexpected. From my understanding, everything had been going swimmingly. This particular guy knows what he’s doing with the ladies and he usually displays that calm confidence that feels unquestionable. He is devoted to his job and is surrounded by a strong group of friends. He made all the right moves and I was intrigued by him. We had a good rapport and hilarious conversations. I also had him as a sleep over buddy on lock whenever I felt so inclined. I addition to all this, we both got to do whatever we wanted. I heard through various channels that there might be another girl and I was occupying myself with other prospects. We didn’t talk about our feelings or troubles and, frankly, didn’t talk often at all.  It was light, fun, and carefree. And then BAM!!  This little display at the bar. Not only did he suck up a large chunk of my night, but I ceased to look available to the other men occupying the bar. I can’t be having that. What drove him to be so emotional when I thought we were so clearly not on the relationship track?

The problem is that men always assume a woman will be emotionally invested in them. That she’ll fall over herself to spend time with him and be with him. That he’s the only one she’s putting in work for. They can’t stand when they’re wrong and make desperate moves to change the game in their favor. Desperation makes me feel physically uncomfortable; I don’t even like seeing it when I’m not involved…

So, sir, while your dramatic conversation had me thinking the next day, it did not have me thinking about spending more time with you. I can no longer take you seriously. If a woman did this she would be considered clingy, crazy, and would be cut from the equation. Consider yourself lucky if I don’t do the same to you. You want more of my time? Earn it. Just because I think you’re attractive and I like that cocky attitude does not mean that I’m clearing my schedule for you. Come up with some better date ideas and stop being so lazy.Oh, and save your feelings for private time. Or better yet, don’t share them at all.

Ladies, take note; it is just as annoying when you act like this as it is when the men act like this.

Don't embarrass yourself, k?